From 3a9350b93cacf1c400f208c3f47dd2bc0008c82d Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Heather Jackson Date: Fri, 27 Mar 2026 17:37:11 -0400 Subject: [PATCH] Whale Song rewrite continues. --- Level 0/PRACTICE_WHALESONG.ink | 64 ++++++++++++++++++++++++---------- OPENING.ink | 4 +-- PLAYLIST.ink | 9 +++-- 3 files changed, 51 insertions(+), 26 deletions(-) diff --git a/Level 0/PRACTICE_WHALESONG.ink b/Level 0/PRACTICE_WHALESONG.ink index 5639b37..5c38ed9 100644 --- a/Level 0/PRACTICE_WHALESONG.ink +++ b/Level 0/PRACTICE_WHALESONG.ink @@ -7,25 +7,35 @@ #AddChar: Fern, Pose: instrument_holding #AddChar: Akai, Pose: instrument_holding -VEZ: Okay, we're booked for the Float the Vote Festival at Erosion. +VEZ: Okay, we're booked for the Blow Your Own Hole Festival at Erosion. FERN: Erosion? Is that the cave club? I'd love to ROCK a cave! (laughs) MICAH: I hate to endorse any pun, but yeah. The acoustics are perfect. -FERN: And it's on the water so the whales can come to the show! +SKYLER: And loud! Shows at Erosion can been heard across the whole city. -SKYLER: That'd be the "Float" part of the Festival. +FERN: Yes! I heard a whale choir practicing the other night. So beautiful! +FERN: I only wish I knew what they were singing. -VEZ: Voting rights for whales would be a significant step toward global equality. +SKYLER: Vez can be your translator. -MICAH: And whales make better choices than humans do. They should get to vote. +FERN: VEZ, YOU SPEAK WHALEISH?!!! -SKYLER: They will. No one is trying to stop it. So our song will be a sure hit! +VEZ: A bit. I took lessons in school, but my intonation was always a little too pitched. + +MICAH: Every human's intonation is too pitched; we're not whales. It's just cool you understand the language. + +FERN: SO COOL! + +MICAH: Whales are smart. We should all listen to what they have to say. + +SKYLER: No one disagrees with that. So our song supporting whale voices will be a sure hit! Vez bristles... + (SLIDE)... but says nothing and lets Skyler's comment slide. + + ... and decides to put Skyler in her place. VEZ: Nothing's a sure thing, Skyler. @@ -73,12 +83,12 @@ AKAI: I've already created two complete percussion tracks. You humans will need + [PLAY STEM A] ~ drums_whalesong = "Human" #PlayMusic: drums_whalesong_human - AKAI: {&It's a "shore party" because humans make the rules!|Humans would like this beat best.} + AKAI: {&It's a "shore party" because humans run the world.|Humans would like this beat best.} -> STEMS_DRUMS + [PLAY STEM B] ~ drums_whalesong = "Whaleish" #PlayMusic: drums_whalesong_whaleish - AKAI: {&If Whales made the rules, I think they'd like these drums best.|I hope the whale vote changes things.} + AKAI: {&If whales had a say, I think they'd like these drums best.|Sounds like whales shakin' things up!} -> STEMS_DRUMS + [PREVIOUS CHARACTER] -> STEMS_BASS @@ -98,7 +108,7 @@ AKAI: I've already created two complete percussion tracks. You humans will need + [PLAY STEM B] #Mood= ~ guitar_whalesong = "Whaleish" #PlayMusic: guitar_whalesong_whaleish - SKYLER: {&A whaley riff says I care about the message more than myself.|This riff isn't as exciting as the solo.|Whaley riff over solo will prove to Vez I've changed.} + SKYLER: {&This riff isn't as exciting as the solo.|Whaley riff over solo will prove to Vez I've changed.|A whaley riff says I care about the message more than myself.} -> STEMS_GUITAR + [PREVIOUS CHARACTER] -> STEMS_DRUMS @@ -139,7 +149,7 @@ AKAI: I've already created two complete percussion tracks. You humans will need + [PLAY STEM B] ~ keys_whalesong = "Whaleish" #PlayMusic: keys_whalesong_whaleish - FERN: {&Synthesized whale sounds are so cool!|No such thing as too much whale!|THIS will Float the Vote!} + FERN: {&Synthesized whale sounds are so cool!|No such thing as too much whale!|THIS will blow them out of the water! In the best way.} -> STEMS_KEYS + [PREVIOUS CHARACTER] -> STEMS_VOCALS @@ -191,25 +201,41 @@ AKAI: I've already created two complete percussion tracks. You humans will need #AddChar: Akai, Pose: instrument_holding { vocals_whalesong == "Whaleish": - FERN: Vez! Are you singing WHALEISH?! + FERN: Vez! Your Whaleish sounds AMAZING!!! - VEZ: Yes, though I'm a bit rusty. - - FERN: It sounds AMAZING!!! + VEZ: Thanks. Though the whales might roast my pronunciation. - else: MICAH: Not bad, everyone. SKYLER: {SLIDE:Like I said, surefire hit!|Yeah. Nobody phoned it in.} - FERN: It's good, but... Vez? Did you sing a different part that sounded super whaley? + FERN: It's good, but... Vez? Didn't I hear you singing some Whaleish lyrics? - VEZ: Yeah, I was playing around with some Whaleish lyrics. - - FERN: You speak WHALEISH?! That's SO COOL! + VEZ: Yeah, I was playing around, but I don't think my pronunciation was right. } -SKYLER: It's risky. Most people can't understand Whaleish. + + MICAH: The whales will appreciate that you tried. + + SKYLER: (laughs) And everyone else will just think you're possessed! + + Everyone glares at Skyler. + + SKYLER: What? Nobody jokes about being possessed by a whale ghost anymore? + + MICAH: That was never a thing. + + FERN: I know you're being mean, Skyler, but you've actually given Vez a compliment! + FERN: Vez's Whaleish is so good it sounds exactly like a whale! + + + FERN: Maybe we can invite a whale to be a guest vocalist. + + VEZ: Oh really? You think we should have a token whale in our band? + + Awkward moment with Fern's idol! As per Mir's suggestion. + - + //revise everything below too... +SKYLER: But most people at the show won't understand Whaleish. AKAI: MAKE THEM LEARN! diff --git a/OPENING.ink b/OPENING.ink index 12edb4e..e38ccb5 100644 --- a/OPENING.ink +++ b/OPENING.ink @@ -31,8 +31,8 @@ MICAH: I haven't played that song since I was in school. FERN: You were in school when it came out? What was it like to LIVE HISTORY?! -MICAH: Woah, woah. "Bandocracy" is 67 years old. I meant I learned it in music class. -//HJ: I'm splitting the difference, Miriam. Let's say the song is 67 years old - less than 100, but more than 50. But definitely not 150 for reasons I explained on the World page. +MICAH: Woah, woah. "Bandocracy" is 50 years old. I meant I learned it in music class. + FERN: Oh, right! Sorry. MICAH: All good. I'll probably forget about this anyway. Because old. SO old. diff --git a/PLAYLIST.ink b/PLAYLIST.ink index 4dfd6b6..65ebc43 100644 --- a/PLAYLIST.ink +++ b/PLAYLIST.ink @@ -16,7 +16,6 @@ Before writing your first song, you gotta book your first show! In the Bandocracy, concerts are put on for a cause, with bands performing songs about the cause. So, you need to know the cause before writing a song. - - L0_song == "Whale Song": Poster of Show Details of Show - location (Erosion) and cause ("Blow Your Own Hole Festival") @@ -133,13 +132,13 @@ = CHOOSE_SHOW_L0 #UI: playlist/shows_L0 - + [SELECT "FLOAT THE VOTE" POSTER] + + [SELECT "BLOW YOUR OWN HOLE" POSTER] - FLOAT THE VOTE FESTIVAL + BLOW YOUR OWN HOLE FESTIVAL Venue - Erosion - Cause - The whales' right to vote in Earth’s elections. + Cause - Support whales having a voice in the Bandocracy! All funds raised go to the Naturals School of Linguistics “Whaleish as a Second Language” program. - Sponsored by the Outlook Neighbourhood Association + Sponsored by the Outlook Neighbourhood Association in collaboration with the Underwater Citizens. - + [START]